I’ve been blogging now just over 4 months. I came here originally because I’m rubbish at writing CVs, bored of rat-race brown-nosing and wanted to get starting doing something on-line. Oh and the financial markets had swallowed up a big chunk of my savings, my fault, I’m a fool, this I already know. WordPress.com blog is free, so I had everything to gain really.
My experience here has far far surpassed my expectations, I’ve “met” so many lovely, helpful and inspiring people, it beggars belief, I still can’t hardly believe it myself. But as you know I’ve had a Troll problem, and dealt with it and posted about it here – https://doncharisma.org/2013/10/10/trollsrus-a-guide-to-blog-trolls-moose-mr-whisk-and-the-axe-murderer/
Before I say what I want to say, here is what Richard Branson says about Charisma on his blog :
What is charisma?
Was asked an interesting question recently about charisma – what it is and why some people feel they have it and others dont.
To me, charisma is being yourself. Somebody who is comfortable in who they are and confident in what they are doing is naturally going to be more charismatic. Trying to be charismatic isnt going to fool anyone, in the same way as trying to be somebody else isnt going to work.
In the same way as a brand can inspire respect and admiration by being genuine and authentic, individuals can do so by helping others feel more contented in their own skin. I dont think theres a secret to charisma, its another word for self-confidence.
What do you think makes somebody charismatic?
Richard Branson (http://www.virgin.com/richard-branson/what-is-charisma)
Richard isn’t my favourite individual (I’ll get back to in a later post), but he is someone that I respect very highly and admire. And he is definitely Charismatic, be hard to argue a case against.
Basically, Richard is saying “Be yourself”, and that’s what I’m trying to do here on my blog, being myself, that’s it.
A fellow blogger writes very much the same here – http://bloodstonescifi.com/dont-worry-about-your-readers-just-be-yourself/, and part of my inspiration in writing this.
I will write more about Charisma later on my blog, because I do feel it’s worthy of more detailed study. I asked a bit of socialite friend once, how he is/was “good” with people, he said “Be cool”. It’s helpful in some ways, in others not. It’s simple, great, but for those that really don’t understand, “cool”, it takes a bit more explanation, “as is” is a bit useless really. Same with Charisma, to say simply, “Be yourself” doesn’t really quite hit the nail on the head for most people that don’t feel they’ve got it. As I said I will expand on this topic as part of what I’m doing here on my blog.
Looking at pictures of Richard Branson enjoying his life and his success, I feel a little bit envious, it’s a normal human emotion. He gets to date just about whoever he wants, has private jet(s) and his own island for pete’s sake. But if I ever met him, you know what I’d say to him, “Richard, I admire you and I’m just a little bit envious of you”. I own my envy, I don’t expect Richard to own it for me, he didn’t cause it, I did, my thought, my comparison, my emotion, my choice to feel that, my responsibility.
Look guys I came here to have a voice, to write about what I want to write about in the way that I want to do it. Most of the time I bend over backwards not to offend people, it’s my nature, I like people to be happy and not feeling insulted. I’m a good hearted person, that’s a principle I believe in.
But there have been people who did get offended, by quite small unimportant things they think I did to them, which honestly I never ever had that intention. I just simply haven’t got time to be annoying people, I’m too busy enjoying what I’m doing.
IF you like my blog, you think I’m OK, cool guy or whatever and enjoy reading my stuff then CONTINUE TO FOLLOW ME. I really appreciate the people who do, I can’t tell you how happy that I am to be able to spread a positive message and enjoy writing and doing this stuff and people actually want to see it and read it. It gives me tremendous satisfaction and joy. I couldn’t be happier, really hard to express in words.
I have now more than 5000 people following my blog and almost impossible for me to give individual attention that I initiate, it would take all my time. I wouldn’t have any time to produce the content on my blog which is why I’m here in the first place, and presumably why you come here. But I always try to help positive and enthusiastic people, or at the very least friendly people, give advice, give tips, give help, have even given emotional support (although I’m not a counselling blog !). I hope that I can make a living doing what I love, and I hope the others out there that want the same can too.
If you want my help, I always do my best to help – COME AND ASK ME
If you want ask me something about being more successful as a blogger – COME AND ASK ME
If you want to make a relevant comment about what I’ve written or add to it – WRITE A COMMENT
If you want to press the like button – PRESS AWAY
If you want to help me, then reblog my stuff, share it, pass it on, it really helps me – SHARE IT
In fact, I’ll take any help I can get, I don’t have a lot of money and never seems to be enough time to do all the things I want on my blog (or in my own life for that matter !)
I’m patient person, but have a fairly dim view of bad behaviour. It’s just respect at the end of the day, you have it for me, I have it for you. You treat me well, I treat you well. Not that complicated.
If you’re easily offended or think that I’m trying to hurt your feelings – PRESS THE UNFOLLOW BUTTON
If just because I followed your blog 1 month ago and haven’t been in touch, and now you’re pissed off because I’m not paying you any attention – PRESS THE UNFOLLOW BUTTON
If you’re pissed off because I liked your stuff and didn’t have a heart to heart with you about how awesome your stuff is – PRESS THE UNFOLLOW BUTTON
If you’re pissed off because I didn’t reply to your message 2 weeks, 2 days, 2 hours, 2 minutes, 2 seconds ago – PRESS THE UNFOLLOW BUTTON
If your envious because I’m enjoying what I’m doing and other people are enjoying it too – PRESS THE UNFOLLOW BUTTON
Really this isn’t Facebook, this is a blog, they are entirely different animals. Facebook has “friends”, blogs have “follow”. If I follow your blog, just means I’m following you with a normal ordinary potentially anonymous interest. Doesn’t mean we need to be talking romantic walks or sending each other lovey dovey messages every five minutes or liking each other’s kids’ birthday party photos. Following just means following, it’s not friends, they are different things. I do have friends here too. Friends take time, and friends take trust.
Busy friends need to be contacted, not because they are arrogant sh** heads, who think they are better than us, but because they’re probably exhausted at the end of a 12/14/16/18 hour shift. Have a heart, and be a grown up and stop this nonsense about who calls who and who’s turn it is to call who, that’s playground stuff, I’ve met more grown up five year olds. I have friends who I speak to everyday, and other friends I speak to occasionally then don’t speak to again for years. None of them could care less who phoned who last, and nor could I. The important thing is that we like each other, we help each other out and that we trust each other, not the frequency or who’s turn it is.
I do work hard, really f***ing hard on this blog. The last post about Trolls took me two long days (12-14 hours each day) to do and the comments answering another couple of days. I don’t mind, I really enjoy what I’m doing here, really enjoy almost every minute.
What I do mind is people being petty and envious, and more than that not owning their pettiness and envy. I’m just a normal dude, I get tired, fed up, bored, exhausted, same as you, I’m not a superhero. Anyone who puts the hours and the passion in could be as successful as me. It does take time, it does take effort, commitment, passion, innovation and charisma but it can be done, anyone can do it, I’m not that special, honestly. Many others are out there that prove me right. We all started with a blank canvass of a blog and didn’t know what the f*** we were doing, like a monkey with a typewriter. We used our brains, found out what works and what doesn’t and just keep on improving on that.
There is such a great opportunity here I just can’t believe that some people just don’t have the self belief to put the effort in and realise it. I really wish I knew the right thing to say, to show you guys what is possible. I keep on posting stuff to help people to enlighten people, to explain how to do this stuff, but it takes me time and energy, and those things are not unlimited. Being Charismatic doesn’t mean working 24/7, that’s unhealthy, not charismatic.
WordPress dot com free blogs have cutting edge plugins, the support is top notch (I’ve worked in IT support), our sites are up 24/7 and have people that fix them when they break down. You try setting all that up on a self-hosted blog and you’ll know what I mean. I’m sure they have to deal with a tremendous amount of crap from people, given the massive number of blogs, there are millions of them. WordPress is awesome compared with Facebook, Twitter, tumblr, blogger, google plus on a whole load of levels. You have an awesome platform on WordPress that is free. Take advantage.
I’ve met a guy here who can’t hardly breath, I gave him an award, he still manages to have an awesome blog, he’s a awesome guy, really positive and happy. I’ve met people here with all kinds of difficulties, people suffering excruciating pain, and yet they still get on with it and are happy and friendly, AND HAVE AWESOME BLOGS.
So please stop BITCHING LIKE BABIES and get on with it, you only get one life, so make the most of it. By all means take a break, take time to “just be”, to be hungover or tired, but put some heart and effort into it, and don’t expect other people to do it all for you. Be the charismatic person that you really are, or learn how. Do you want to look back on your life and say “I could have” OR do you want to say “I did” or at least “I tried” ?
Learn to be the charismatic people you admire, mums, dads, astronauts, teachers, monks, Richard Branson, etc as best you can or simply just don’t follow my blog, it’s not a blog about being pointless and pathetic or lazy and a victim.
One of the keys to Charisma is being yourself. I’m by nature easy going, happy go lucky, but sometimes being yourself means being firm and putting your foot down, which is why I wrote this. If you like my blog, think I’m OK, then keep following me, happy to have you on board. If not then press the unfollow button and go and find some blogs that you do like, I’m happy you are standing up for yourself, making a choice and acting on it, at least there’s charisma in that.
I wish to express my thanks to friends and mentors that know me here on WordPress, they are a massive source of inspiration and encouragement, real giants of people, people I aspire to be like.
I also wish to express my thanks to each and every one that does follow my blog, I am happy that you like me and my stuff.
Resources & Sources
“Don’t worry about your readers, just be yourself” – http://bloodstonescifi.com/dont-worry-about-your-readers-just-be-yourself/