Compassion – In Loving Memory Of Janet

This is my own response to my own prompt – Compassion – Don Charisma’s Prompt. One of my readers said something that reminded me of this, need to write it now, or tomorrow it’ll be gone.

DonCharisma.org-Field-Rip-Grass

It was my second year at University. Janet I’d not met before and bumped into in the smoking area. She’s one of those very rare women that I just felt utterly at ease with the moment I met her. No hidden agendas or manipulative game player in her, just a really lovely down to earth bright woman. Easily my type, very attractive woman, but never needing anything like that with her and she I felt felt the same way about me.

I also knew her husband who worked as a technician at the University. I really liked him too, just both straightforward friendly honest people.

Janet and I worked on all our projects and assignments together and were inseparable. There were a couple of others who joined our study group, but Janet and I worked on anything and everything. The couple of years to graduation passed, and we went our separate ways. She lived local to the University and stayed there, and I went back home and then got a job in London, some 200 miles away.

The summer progressed, and one day I got a phone call. It was Janet’s husband’s boss, to say that she’s died. I can still remember how sad I was having lost such an amazing friend. She’d locked her keys inside her house and attempted to climb to the first floor window to get in. She’d slipped and feel on her head, and died as a result of her injuries.

Janet is and was one of my closest friends, and a woman that I do miss very much, such a warm and genuine person, totally authentic and not a bad bone in her body. She was only 31 at the time, left behind a lovely husband, coolest guy you’d ever want to meet. I can’t really express how unfair I felt that was, and how unfair I still feel it is for her to die so young.

I travelled up by train and stayed with a friend for the funeral and the wake. Nobody likes funerals or wakes really, they are a time to grieve and let go.

I have tears welling in my eyes writing this …

The wake and funeral came and went. I ended up in a nightclub in the University town with some of the others from the wake including Janet’s husband. We were all pretty drunk by 1 or 2am, and trying to drown our sorrows. I saw the sadness in Janet’s husband’s eyes, and he saw mine, I gave the man a hug and we cried on each other’s shoulders to blaring dance music. I remember feeling a bit embarrassed and self-concious at one point, then thinking to myself, really I don’t care, I miss my dear friend so very much – the least I can do is share my grief and sadness with the man who was probably closest of all to her.

Her husband and I kept in touch for a time, he sold their house and I think departed for Australia on his travels. Long since we’ve lost touch, many moons have passed by now. It’s not that often now that I think of Janet. But I will always miss her authenticity, humour and charisma 🙂


A little melancholy I guess, and I can see more than one of my own prompts in this writing … it is a true story, for me I just wanted to write it down and share, not an attempt at any style of writing … more than anything I just wrote it for myself to remember my dear friend Janet by.

Warm regards

Don Charisma


Resources & Sources

Grass Field – MorgueFile


Notes for commenters:

Don Charisma Warning Improvised Writing

Comments are invited. BUT you are reminded that this is a public blog and you are also reminded to think before you press the “post comment” button. 

Good manners are a mark of a charismatic person – so please keep comments civil, non-argumentative, constructive and related, or they will be moderated. If you feel you can’t comply, press the “unfollow” button and/or refrain from commenting.

I read ALL comments but can’t always reply. I will comment if I think there’s something that I can add to what you’ve said. I do delete without notice comments that don’t follow rules above. For persistent offenders I will ignore you permanently and/or report you.

Most decent people already know how to behave respectfully. Thank you for your co-operation on the above.

Warm regards, Don Charisma



56 thoughts on “Compassion – In Loving Memory Of Janet

  1. Hi Don, this is truly a beautiful and moving tribute to your most loved friend, who seemed to be a great human being. It shows how important it is to value your friends while they are alive. 🙂

  2. I like you heart Don, I have needed a lot of Compassion knowing all forms of rejection in my life even as a young child, some I caused myself later as an Adult in my hurt and confusion, I hope it is OK to leave a link, it will save detail here, if not, just delete it.

    Childhood http://freedomborn.wordpress.com/2011/09/27/the-early-years-a-little-lost-girl/

    I feel one of the hardest forms of rejection is apathy, even being warned in Love your in danger is better than being ignored, at least it shows someone cares.

    I enjoyed the Compassion poems you shared, they touched my heart with their sincerity as did your sharing about Janet too, Thank you.

    Blessings – Anne

    1. Hey Anne, thanks 🙂

      I’ve met a few people who didn’t mind rejection, although I think in the main most of us don’t like it.

      You’re welcome to share relevant links. Only thing I take issue is people spamming me generally, and relevant non-commercial links aren’t 🙂

      The others did lovely poems too, it was a hard piece to publish, true writing often is …

      Warm regards

      Don

    1. Thanks Elaine, I just realised I don’t know the dates, it’s possible that my internal clock “remembered” could easily have been this time of year. Janet was a good person, and a friend that’s sorely missed. Her husband is also a lovely man, and a privilege to have been able to be a support for him …

  3. Don what a nice friendship you had with her and how sad for her to die that way. I could feel your pain. Hugs, Yazmin

      1. 🙂 there should be more people like this in the world. I know a few but not everyone is like that

  4. People come into our lives for a season (and a reason). I am sorry for your loss of a wonderful person that you knew but blessed because the words you wrote touched not only myself but others.

  5. Thanks for sharing this with us all. Few of us make such an authentic connection with another, sounds like she was a special woman. You honor her with your memories and kind written words.

    1. Thanks hun, virtual hugs are accepted 🙂

      We’re both lucky good friends spending time doing something worthwhile for ourselves … she even got higher marks than me, she was one of the few that got a first … good to remember old friends sometimes 🙂

      1. It is okay to still miss her, the friendship you had and the memories you didn’t get to make, DC. Completely human of you and it’s important that you write about how you truly feel. You are something to marvel…I’d hug you if I could. 🙂

        I was just working on a post for your prompt. You moved me..

      2. I know hun, and I was very lucky for the time that I with her, such a beautiful person … and thanks … virtual hugs accepted !

        Looking forward to seeing some more of your amazing writing 🙂

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