This is cutting edge improvisational blogging.
We call it – “Whose Blog is it anyway ?”
We have written this for FUN, not serious, to amuse ourselves and our readers, and help promote our blogs. So please read with that in mind.

Me And Nav
Nav and I share a common ethos, neither of us suffer misandrists gladly.
Suz Jones was the catalyst that brought us finally together after his recent “Follow Blogger” submission on her blog. I hadn’t until that point realised that he was someone I wanted to get to know, or any common interest apart from both being men. After reading his about page, and empathising with what he’d been through, I decided to cultivate him as a friend. Indeed a good friend he has indeed turned out to be.
Nav is an accomplished wordsmith and currently working on a new fiction book that is an exposé of misandrists. At least that’s how I understand it.
You can find Nav at THE MIRROR blog.
Please do enjoy Nav’s guest improviser submission.
Cheers
Don Charisma
‘What do women want?’ is the dumbest question a man could ever ask
Intro
(Don Charisma – No Intro from Nav)
Discussion
Without a doubt, the dumbest question a man could ever ask is, “What do women want?” By the time you think to ask it, it is already too late. Might as well be half way up la rivière du Poop and ask, “Why would I ever need a paddle?”
Let me give you a true example. One Canadian Christmas when I was a wee lad, my mother wondered where her Christmas gift was. Dad told her: “It’s in the garage.” Mom ran out to the garage, excited that she was getting a car for Christmas.
Only there was no car. Instead, there was a brand new snow shovel. Seems Mom had been griping about shovelling snow when Dad was away. Dad couldn’t fathom Mom’s disappointment. “What do women want?”
Not your best question, Pop.
As men, we must understand what women want before coming in contact with this rather alien gender. To do this, we must turn first to biology. It is a fact that women prefer rugged, masculine men when they are ovulating. The women, that is. The remaining 90% of the time, women prefer sensitive and supportive men.

This explains why navigators are in such high demand. We’re masculine, yet we also do dishes. Sometimes. This is why feminists say, “Don’t be that guy.” Even feminists don’t like wusses.
The lesson here is that 90% of the time, women don’t really know what they want. That rounds up to 100% of the time. So let’s ignore them, and use REASON to figure out what women REALLY want.
Women are sensitive about their appearances. Think of the clichéd line “Does this dress make me look fat?” What women REALLY want is to never be in that awkward position. So keep an eye on your wife’s weight for her. “Gee, Honey, did you shrink your jeans? Why don’t you try cottage cheese for lunch?”
She’ll thank you. It’s your way of showing you care about her feelings.
Hair? She’ll bouff it up for that night you’re both going out. Why? Why does the sun rise? She has insecurities. Tell her that her night out hairdo would make Medusa look good. This means that her normal hair do is beautiful. She’ll feel great about herself and will love you for it.
Is she upset about the toilet seat being left up again? “Gee, Love. It isn’t fair that I don’t have a urinal in the bathroom, is it? Besides, it also isn’t fair that I have to lift it up AND put it down. We’re supposed to share the work.” She’ll appreciate your sharing how you feel about the issue. She will also appreciate realizing that you two can have a meaningful, adult conversation when she is being unreasonable.
You can’t put a price on unconditional love.
Women also need to feel secure. This includes financially. So stop buying her flowers. It’s insensitive wasting money like that. Pick dandelions for her instead. You save money, get the organic salad greens, save her some grocery shopping and yardwork, and show her you care in one fell swoop.
Since women don’t know what they want, you’d better know for them, before it’s too late. “What do women want?” is indeed the dumbest question a man could ever ask.
Don’t be that guy.
Outro
(Don Charisma – No Outro from Nav)
BY navigator1965, blogger extraordinaire at the THE MIRROR blog.
Please note:
Comments are invited, but you are reminded that this is a public blog and also reminded to think before you press the “post comment” button.
Good manners are a mark of a charismatic person – so please keep comments civil, constructive and related, or they will be moderated. If you feel you can’t comply, press the “unfollow” button and/or refrain from commenting.
Thank you for your co-operation on this.
I do read ALL comments. I can’t always reply to every comment. I will comment if I think there’s something that I can add to what you’ve said.
Warm regards, Don Charisma
Resources & Sources
Image of navigator with sextant – public domain – wikipedia
Very funny. Some of do know what we want sometimes but most of the time I’m just happy to be appreciated for being who I am. The same could be said of 99 percent of the other people on the planet, regardless of gender.
Thanks for the smile and for reminding me that I have an awesome husband. I’m sure he thanks you as well.
Hi Sharon,
Your kind reply has me laughing. Thank you. Yes, husbands everywhere are in my debt for this one. Beers rain upon me.
I like reading a man’s perspective about women. Quite entertaining. 🙂 Some of us can be complicated, but then some of us know exactly what we want, and it isn’t complicated— someone to cook, do the dishes, the laundry, and don’t talk to us while we are watching football.
It’d be boring if we were all the same 🙂 cheers DC
I think you two are very aware of one thing many people want (male or female) – humour (sorry about Oz spelling).:)
I can’t speak for all women but men get away with a lot if they have a funny side.
My father bought my step-mother a huge industrial mixer for her birthday ONCE (really for himself). She was NOT impressed, so he called it Bertha to temper the disappointment. Humour didn’t work that time.
Good point Susan 🙂
As a blogger to misogyny, I always find generalizations like above on woman mostly dictated by American TV shows and commercials. Why would a woman want to be insecure or being unsure of what they want? Why would any human being find comfort in that state. But I don’t blaim the perception, especially after all the comedy shows around the woman image who is blond and stupid and is only caring about not being fat. That image of a woman in fact has also being dictated by beauty contests. In the old days beautiful women image was rounder. The definition of beautiful was around the natural body of men and women. Now it has been defined by six pack muscles, very skinny figures. No wonder why the ignorant woman tries to lose weight without even knowing why? The reason probably is because the man wants that figure. And the reason the man wants that figure is probably because that is what he saw on TV being predefined as beautiful to him.
I must admit that the post has sweet remarks which I had to smile myself:) I am looking forward to navigators book.
Some of us still remember, obviously.
OMG…that is just hilarious! I thought I’d better type that here before I change my mind and get pissed off, hehe.
After 30 years in a military uniform, I know how to live dangerously!
Glad you liked it, Laura. Thanks for commenting.
I take my hat off to you Nav 😉
Thanks, Sue. It’s a wonder that I’ve lived as long as I have.
*nav cues burlesque music album on the turntable*
🙂 🙂
You did write this very funny here Navigator.
As a woman I think it is okay for a man (and a woman) to ask your partner, what the other would like or are thinking and wishing. It is NOT okay to need to guess the others minding. Why not talk together instead?
Thanks for sharing.
Irene
Thank you, Irene. Your kind words are as beautiful as is your jewlery.
I missed the 2nd part of your comment. You’re absolutely right, of course. There needs to be an honest dialogue between wife and husband.
I have to say as the single mom of a teen aged son – I never get after him for leaving the seat up, but I also never put it up just in case he is the next person to use the bathroom – – I’m stuck, what
Do Men Really Want?
LOL – Nice post – And since I didn’t spy it in your post – I’ll let you in on a secret that would have been good for me to know decades ago, when I loudly declared that I didn’t want expensive jewelry (I’ll rarely, if ever wear for fear of losing it) and asked instead that we save such sums for house payments, etc…..
Unbeknownst to me, fine jewelry is a woman’s nest egg – – -it’s a liquid asset that does not require the hiring of an expensive lawyer to get your due when hubby finds someone else to buy jewelry for – – SOO – with this tidbit, just saying – –
Women really want fine Jewelry… even if they never wear it…..
ROFL
TamrahJo,
You put a big smile on my face. Glad you liked the post.
Shiny jewelry? Have you seen this one by snoogiefisk?: http://mostlytrueramblings.com/2014/01/03/its-amazing-that-i-dont-kill-him-in-his-sleep/
}:-)>
Hmm – Sad, but over half of the list, I wondered, “Is it considered plagarism if some woman’s husband says the same stupid things as mine did?”
ROFL
That was pretty much my response to her list- ROFL
ExcelLENT!!! 😀 Lovely going nav- I enjoyed this — as did George when I read it to him – He CHUCKLED away…. 😉
Thank you, IW. It was a rather fun exercise in what NOT to do as the man in a relationship. Glad George liked it too.
Cool 😉
Whilst it is not what to do, men being the practical type will always do it anyway. 🙂
I must point out that I have had more wives than you, Ms. suzjones. Relatively speaking, that makes me an authority.
How do you know I wasn’t male in a previous life?
Good point.
Almost a given.
Reblogged this on Waiting for Prince Charming and commented:
An amusing read by two very articulate men.. For fun I may have to write a response to this 😉
Thanks for reblog 🙂
You’re very welcome.. I hope you don’t mind, you’ve inspired a response to it.. I thoroughly enjoyed it, and just had to expand on your lads’ ideas.
Cheers!
Yes of course no problem, we’re trying to have fun this weekend 🙂 cheers DC
До голяма степен този въпрос е забавен. Аз дори се питам дали не става дума за моя блог, където се опитвам да пиша като мъж, а съм жена Беше ми интересно и трудно да напиша този текст. Там пробвах да акцентирам върху разликата между женското и мъжкото мислене. Като жена се питах какво ли е мъжкото мислене…. Това е същия въпрос , обърнат на обратно Моля, погледнете моя блог, може да ви стане интересно
bestselleerworld.wordprsess.com
The only reason that I won’t agree is that I am afraid I’ll end up with an East Euorpean wife if I do. Not that I would necessarily mind. However, “someone” might not be enthusiastic about such a potential outcome.
Otherwise, yes dear.
Oh, and highly entertaining lads, thank you. Mind if I share?
Of course, be our guest 🙂 warm regards DC
And to you, cheers.
I must defer to DC, as it’s his place.
**Giggle** Oh now, why wasn’t I included in this Navigator? Could’ve been fun 😉 Incidentally gentlemen, you’ll never guess what I was working on this morning, perhaps less satirical, but funny all the same.. Great minds thinking alike and all 😉
🙂
Does that mean I have to share my TOTAL WORLD DOMINATION 2014 with you?
Ooooo, that sounds like a fun scheme I should fit into!
Lol. Are you married? Still married? 🙂 x
Divorced once, book comes out in February. Currently kind-of/sort-of married.
I have enough “time in” that I can laugh at relationships and the broader gender dialectic.
Bit like that myself. If you didn’t laugh you’d fairly bawl and greet! 😉 x
Sa-weet post. Women don’t know AT all. Or they do, but only in 30 minute intervals because they can change their minds? Or not? Im not sure….
Thank you. Hopefully you won’t be seeing my picture on a wanted sign at the post office anytime soon because of the post.
Women don’t know what women want
Women want to be loved, cherished, desired, respected, and to feel secure in all regards, as a general rule.
Men want that too, it’s what’s expected I presume.
Guilty as charged!
I thought so!!! XD
I wasn’t supposed to tell.
Agreed!
And to think I wrote that in a state of complete sobriety. Will wonders never cease to amaze me?
Can you imagine what wine would have added to that piece – shoo! 😉
I’d probably be in jail right now.
Exactly Nav!!
Steady on course!
My girlfriend seems to do a pretty good job of knowing what she wants, she picked me for starters 🙂
😉 Put your hat back on before you head outgrows it!!! 😀
Haha! Yes! Smart girl I imagine then! She’s a keeper then 🙂
Yup for sure, I couldn’t be happier …
And I do admit sometimes she doesn’t know what she wants, but I can usually help her with that 🙂
Warm regards
DC
Glad you are happy!! It’s a double X chromosome thing 🙂
🙂
Reblogged this on The Mirror and commented:
DonCharisma seeks some lighthearted navigator wisdom about women. Look no further…
You crack me up!
Thanks, Mich. I’m glad you could see the obvious humour in my advice to men on what their lovely wives REALLY want. };-)>
there would be something really wrong with me otherwise – me thinks lol 😉
LOL not seeking dude, was an opportunity for you to write you cheeky bugger !
Thanks for reblog 🙂
And thank you, my good Sir, for lending me your podium. Much appreciated.
You’re welcome 🙂 DC
Hmmm….
🙂
You’ve sent me an empty reply, did you mean to?
There was a colon and a bracket, makes a smiley face …
Nothing was showing?! But thank you 😉
That was extraordinarily amusing! Because women really do not what they want in most cases, and men are left with the job of psychic while their telepathy helmet is being repaired several light years away; in other words, said man will be dead before he gets it back. So, to most men, y’all ought to brush up on the charm skills 😀
Indeed, a little charm, consideration, and courtesy go a long way.
Yes, most men do not realize it, but chivalry really isn’t dead. We like having the car door opened. and the doors held. It is just in the name of Feminism, women have forgotten that chivalry still exists.
Very well said !
Thank you 😀
Thanks for liking our blog, Sheshe and Camilla.
Welcome 🙂 DC
Welcome to you to Sheshe and Camilla
You are welcome, thank you 🙂
Outro –ageous! In a good way. Thanks, to both of you extraordinary gentlemen.
You’re welcome from DC 🙂
You’re very welcome, Ann.